Okay, so technically my third trimester started Thursday (according to my iPhone), and technically it's not March until tomorrow. But all things considered, I think the whole "March comes in like a lion, goes out like a lamb" thing is perfectly a propos to my situation. If by "out like a lamb" you mean big and puffy and bleating a lot, which is how I envision myself in 30 days time.
The lion part? Let's just say the ol' Tagamet HB that the nurse recommended I give a shot before getting a prescription for the real stuff is not going to cut it. I need the hard drugs. Stat. I can't eat anything, at any time of day, without creating near fatal levels of acid reflux. I'm dying here. I woke up every night this past week choking on stomach acid. It was so bad Friday night that all day yesterday I had that lump-in-your-throat feeling, the one that hurts extra bad when you think too hard about why your throat hurts (festering acid burns) and makes all food and drink completely joyless, if not painful, to consume. Seeing as eating is all I've got, I take this very, very personally.
Oooh, and also, I had my very first hormonal nervous breakdown! Yeay! You know, I was so even-keeled up to this point that I was worried I would miss out on this great pregnancy side effect completely! I'm so happy that it looks like I am going to get to experience the pregnancy psychosis after all.
It was all because Mo left on a business trip. For a week. That I'd known was coming for at least a week. Now, keep in mind that in our time together I have sent him off TO WAR. Multiple times. Into Iraq and Afghanistan. Not knowing when exactly he would be home. Not knowing when exactly I would hear from him either via phone or email. I drove him to get on the plane for a FOUR MONTH deployment to the middle east and managed to keep a smile on my face the entire time. Kissed him goodbye and said "I'll see you when you get home!" and didn't even cry as I drove away. Um, fast forward to pregnant Tori, sobbing face down on the couch because he was GONE and I wouldn't hear from him until he GOT TO THE AIRPORT TWENTY MINUTES LATER.
Now, I feel comfortable blaming this episode on hormones because there was a part of me in my brain that could step back and say, "wow, you're really losing it. And really for no good reason. This must be the hormones talking." And eventually I was able to recover - and even be my chipper self when he called to check in on the unstable woman he'd left behind.
Good times.
Sunday, February 28, 2010
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
When I'm overwhelmed, I stay in my pajamas all day
I think I need to move my (very important) Blog Reading Time to the afternoon. Reading blogs with my morning coffee tends to turn into reading blogs at noon in my pajamas and still not having eaten.
I've noticed that when I put off my blog time until the afternoon, I'm much more discriminating. I'm skimming, I'm avoiding long link-following tangents. I read what I care about reading and I move on. Not sure why it's different, but it seems like it is.
And, if I read my blogs in the afternoon, I would avoid seeing things like this until after I had actually accomplished something with my day. As it stands, I read this particular post mid-morning and it stopped me dead in my tracks. At first I was inspired - the author of this post designed her nursery after a favorite tank top. I picked my color palette from a favorite pair of pajama pants. But inspiration was quickly overtaken by panic and stress. The woman bought balsa wood and painted it in a coordinating color and drilled holes in it all to MAKE BACKGROUNDS FOR THE LABELS SHE WAS PUTTING ON THE BASKETS TO HOLD DIAPERS. At this point, I am totally sweaty and on the verge of tears. How am I ever going to get any of this done? I've never even drilled holes in ANYTHING.
So basically I have total deer-in-the-headlights-itis. I had big plans to get the 1982 bathroom all repainted. When I needed a break from that, I was planning a trip to the baby furniture store to price out gliders. Maybe see if they have any mattresses or covers that will work with my bassinet. Instead I'm sitting here in my pajamas, eating M&Ms.
I know I'm overthinking this one. I have put together many a decent looking room totally by accident, and on a rational level I'm sure this nursery will be no different. But on an irrational level, however well I do or do not put together the nursery reflects how much I love the kid, or how good a mother I will be. I know that's asinine, but it's a feeling that's there somewhere. Maybe now that I've acknowledged it out in the open I can move on. Just buy some damn paint and get on with it.
I've noticed that when I put off my blog time until the afternoon, I'm much more discriminating. I'm skimming, I'm avoiding long link-following tangents. I read what I care about reading and I move on. Not sure why it's different, but it seems like it is.
And, if I read my blogs in the afternoon, I would avoid seeing things like this until after I had actually accomplished something with my day. As it stands, I read this particular post mid-morning and it stopped me dead in my tracks. At first I was inspired - the author of this post designed her nursery after a favorite tank top. I picked my color palette from a favorite pair of pajama pants. But inspiration was quickly overtaken by panic and stress. The woman bought balsa wood and painted it in a coordinating color and drilled holes in it all to MAKE BACKGROUNDS FOR THE LABELS SHE WAS PUTTING ON THE BASKETS TO HOLD DIAPERS. At this point, I am totally sweaty and on the verge of tears. How am I ever going to get any of this done? I've never even drilled holes in ANYTHING.
So basically I have total deer-in-the-headlights-itis. I had big plans to get the 1982 bathroom all repainted. When I needed a break from that, I was planning a trip to the baby furniture store to price out gliders. Maybe see if they have any mattresses or covers that will work with my bassinet. Instead I'm sitting here in my pajamas, eating M&Ms.
I know I'm overthinking this one. I have put together many a decent looking room totally by accident, and on a rational level I'm sure this nursery will be no different. But on an irrational level, however well I do or do not put together the nursery reflects how much I love the kid, or how good a mother I will be. I know that's asinine, but it's a feeling that's there somewhere. Maybe now that I've acknowledged it out in the open I can move on. Just buy some damn paint and get on with it.
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
An Important Retraction
I would like to recant my previous statement about Husband's work pants.
It is, in fact, untrue that they are acid washed. They are simply a very light wash denim. One that is supposedly very much back in fashion.
How I could be so insensitive as to call those jeans acid washed, I cannot explain. They are simply light wash, tapered leg cK jeans from the 90s, and for me to suggest otherwise was completely irresponsible. I did not realize how devastating this miscomunication of fact would be and I am glad to set the record straight.
Poor sweet Husband. He's really quite stylish.
It is, in fact, untrue that they are acid washed. They are simply a very light wash denim. One that is supposedly very much back in fashion.
How I could be so insensitive as to call those jeans acid washed, I cannot explain. They are simply light wash, tapered leg cK jeans from the 90s, and for me to suggest otherwise was completely irresponsible. I did not realize how devastating this miscomunication of fact would be and I am glad to set the record straight.
Poor sweet Husband. He's really quite stylish.
Monday, February 22, 2010
You know, I might just be pregnant
I stopped into my local neighborhood drugstore this afternoon for some Pepcid AC and two bags of Easter candy.
On my way home from pilates.
Yeah, and I busted into the Reese's Eggs on the 1/2 mile drive home.
This explicitly pregnant lady behavior led me to have my first public pregnancy conversation, when the cashier looked at me while ringing up the lady in front of me in line and said, "so when ya due?" The three of us ladies proceeded to talk weight gain and baby size for the duration of our transactions. Cashier lady also told me that having a lot of heartburn means the baby is going to be born with lots of hair.
I think it may also mean that mom should lay off the chocolate.
On my way home from pilates.
Yeah, and I busted into the Reese's Eggs on the 1/2 mile drive home.
This explicitly pregnant lady behavior led me to have my first public pregnancy conversation, when the cashier looked at me while ringing up the lady in front of me in line and said, "so when ya due?" The three of us ladies proceeded to talk weight gain and baby size for the duration of our transactions. Cashier lady also told me that having a lot of heartburn means the baby is going to be born with lots of hair.
I think it may also mean that mom should lay off the chocolate.
Friday, February 19, 2010
Split pea thoughts for next time
1. Try not to include little hambones easily mistaken for potato chunks.
2. Use a waxy variety potato next time; Russet turned a skosh mealy.
3. Add a chopped carrot along with said waxy potato, post blender.
4. Take Cook's Illustrated's advice and use ham steak instead of ham hock - I don't really enjoy the scent of bone in my soup. Plus some of the meat that comes off a hock is pretty nasty.
Here is the recipe for my concoction. I just had some for lunch with a 1/2 a grilled cheese, and you should, too.
Split Pea Soup a la Porkchop
adapted from several sources
1 C chopped onion
1/2 C chopped carrot
1/2 C chopped celery
2 T butter
1.5 LB smoked ham hock
1.5 C split peas, rinsed and checked for rocks
2 t dried marjoram (or 1 t thyme and 1 t oregano)
1 bay leaf
8 C water
1 chunked up potato
1 chunked up carrot
1/2 C leftover mashed potatoes (optional)
salt and pepper
In a large enough soup pot, melt the butter over medium heat. Add the chopped veg and sweat until soft,maybe 10 minutes. Add the ham hock, peas and herbs and stir. After a minute or so, cover with the water. Bring to a boil and simmer, stirring occasionally, until the ham is falling off the bone and the peas are mushy. A little over an hour, in my case.
Remove the ham to a cutting board and find the stupid bay leaf - remove it, too. Take half of the soup and either blend in batches in the blender or use a hand blender to puree until bright green and smooth. Return to pot with the unblended half. Add your chunked up veg and the mashed potatoes (if using) and continue to simmer until the potatoes are cooked through. In the meantime salvage what ham you can off the hock and return it to the pot as well. Taste and season with S&P.
I would recommend making this the day before you actually want to eat it - it tastes best if you refrigerate it overnight and reheat it the next day. Makes about 10 cups of soup.
2. Use a waxy variety potato next time; Russet turned a skosh mealy.
3. Add a chopped carrot along with said waxy potato, post blender.
4. Take Cook's Illustrated's advice and use ham steak instead of ham hock - I don't really enjoy the scent of bone in my soup. Plus some of the meat that comes off a hock is pretty nasty.
Here is the recipe for my concoction. I just had some for lunch with a 1/2 a grilled cheese, and you should, too.
Split Pea Soup a la Porkchop
adapted from several sources
1 C chopped onion
1/2 C chopped carrot
1/2 C chopped celery
2 T butter
1.5 LB smoked ham hock
1.5 C split peas, rinsed and checked for rocks
2 t dried marjoram (or 1 t thyme and 1 t oregano)
1 bay leaf
8 C water
1 chunked up potato
1 chunked up carrot
1/2 C leftover mashed potatoes (optional)
salt and pepper
In a large enough soup pot, melt the butter over medium heat. Add the chopped veg and sweat until soft,maybe 10 minutes. Add the ham hock, peas and herbs and stir. After a minute or so, cover with the water. Bring to a boil and simmer, stirring occasionally, until the ham is falling off the bone and the peas are mushy. A little over an hour, in my case.
Remove the ham to a cutting board and find the stupid bay leaf - remove it, too. Take half of the soup and either blend in batches in the blender or use a hand blender to puree until bright green and smooth. Return to pot with the unblended half. Add your chunked up veg and the mashed potatoes (if using) and continue to simmer until the potatoes are cooked through. In the meantime salvage what ham you can off the hock and return it to the pot as well. Taste and season with S&P.
I would recommend making this the day before you actually want to eat it - it tastes best if you refrigerate it overnight and reheat it the next day. Makes about 10 cups of soup.
Thursday, February 18, 2010
26 Weeks
Today marks 26 weeks, aka 14 weeks to the due date, aka two weeks from bi-weekly doctor appointments, aka the last week of my 2nd trimester. Eeek!
Needless to say, we're transitioning from "casual baby prep" mode to "oh crap we gotta get ready for this baby" mode. Considering I just had a friend give birth at 36 weeks, I've realized I should probably try to get all the basics taken care of by more like mid-April than mid-May.
Physically speaking, I'm starting to get big. I know I keep saying that, but no - FOR REALS now. My belly measures 40 and 1/2 inches around, and I'm up twenty pounds from where I started - I've crossed the 150 pound threshold for the first time in my life.
I don't feel bad about the weight. I know I'm a girl and I'm supposed to worry about it, but I just don't. To me, I'm pregnant, and it's a golden opportunity to eat what I want and gain whatever I gain and just not give an eff. Harumpf.
This week in food:
I got my soup made. I realize that this photo is not appetizing even if you love split pea soup, and that if you hate split pea soup this might be the most revolting image you have ever seen. But I did not really have the time, patience or marbles required to style soup attractively, so it is what it is.
(I'm not making that up, by the way. Food stylists use marbles to style soup. To hold up the carrots and potatoes and what not so they don't sink to the bottom. Fun fact!)
Anyway, soup made and delivered to Grandpa. It's a good batch, if I do say so myself. My secret weapon for velvety smoothness was a 1/2 cup or so of leftover mashed potatoes.
Fajitas for dinner. Just in case you were wondering what I've been stuffing my face with lately. My preferred fajita ratio is one small onion to two bell peppers, one chicken breast and one can of black beans. That allows the two of us to stuff ourselves with a couple of lunches worth of leftovers. You wouldn't think it with only one chicken breast, wouldja?
This is my latest craving. Green salad with garbanzos, hard boiled egg and cheddar on top. All dressed with some Italian style dressing. I've had one for three days straight now.
Needless to say, we're transitioning from "casual baby prep" mode to "oh crap we gotta get ready for this baby" mode. Considering I just had a friend give birth at 36 weeks, I've realized I should probably try to get all the basics taken care of by more like mid-April than mid-May.
Physically speaking, I'm starting to get big. I know I keep saying that, but no - FOR REALS now. My belly measures 40 and 1/2 inches around, and I'm up twenty pounds from where I started - I've crossed the 150 pound threshold for the first time in my life.
I don't feel bad about the weight. I know I'm a girl and I'm supposed to worry about it, but I just don't. To me, I'm pregnant, and it's a golden opportunity to eat what I want and gain whatever I gain and just not give an eff. Harumpf.
This week in food:
I got my soup made. I realize that this photo is not appetizing even if you love split pea soup, and that if you hate split pea soup this might be the most revolting image you have ever seen. But I did not really have the time, patience or marbles required to style soup attractively, so it is what it is.
(I'm not making that up, by the way. Food stylists use marbles to style soup. To hold up the carrots and potatoes and what not so they don't sink to the bottom. Fun fact!)
Anyway, soup made and delivered to Grandpa. It's a good batch, if I do say so myself. My secret weapon for velvety smoothness was a 1/2 cup or so of leftover mashed potatoes.
Fajitas for dinner. Just in case you were wondering what I've been stuffing my face with lately. My preferred fajita ratio is one small onion to two bell peppers, one chicken breast and one can of black beans. That allows the two of us to stuff ourselves with a couple of lunches worth of leftovers. You wouldn't think it with only one chicken breast, wouldja?
This is my latest craving. Green salad with garbanzos, hard boiled egg and cheddar on top. All dressed with some Italian style dressing. I've had one for three days straight now.
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
No Soup
This is as far as my split pea soup project went this weekend. That is not to say, however, that I was not productive. I just changed projects midstream.
We decided to finally get the kitchen painted instead. Here is an action shot of Husband, vacuuming out the underbelly of the range. I would like to make a point of telling you that he does not regularly wear acid washed cK tapered leg jeans. These are his "work jeans," and any time he puts them on, I know that a project is going to get DONE.
I don't know if it's the nesting instinct kicking in, or just me getting older and more finicky, but I have never in my life been so excited about pulling a range out from the wall and scrubbing it down. I focused on that puppy like I'd taken a handful of Adderall. I also cleaned the top and back sides of the fridge, so long as we were pulling major appliances out from their spots and all.
Before
After!(Good job picking up before taking the stupid photo, right?)
I love, love this color. I am a big fan of mossy greens. This one in particular is a Behr paint called Lucky Bamboo. I wanted to do something to perk up the wood, and I think that I did it. I can't say that this kitchen is really my taste, but I've been much happier since I decided to go with it's traditional vibe rather than fight it. It's cheaper that way, at the very least. We (Husband) also painted the hall bathroom...but I'm not posting any pictures of that because I still HATE it. It looks like something straight out of 1982. I don't know what I can possibly do to fix it, short of ripping out the pink formica vanity with my bare hands.
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