Wednesday, February 24, 2010

When I'm overwhelmed, I stay in my pajamas all day

I think I need to move my (very important) Blog Reading Time to the afternoon. Reading blogs with my morning coffee tends to turn into reading blogs at noon in my pajamas and still not having eaten.

I've noticed that when I put off my blog time until the afternoon, I'm much more discriminating. I'm skimming, I'm avoiding long link-following tangents. I read what I care about reading and I move on. Not sure why it's different, but it seems like it is.

And, if I read my blogs in the afternoon, I would avoid seeing things like this until after I had actually accomplished something with my day. As it stands, I read this particular post mid-morning and it stopped me dead in my tracks. At first I was inspired - the author of this post designed her nursery after a favorite tank top. I picked my color palette from a favorite pair of pajama pants. But inspiration was quickly overtaken by panic and stress. The woman bought balsa wood and painted it in a coordinating color and drilled holes in it all to MAKE BACKGROUNDS FOR THE LABELS SHE WAS PUTTING ON THE BASKETS TO HOLD DIAPERS. At this point, I am totally sweaty and on the verge of tears. How am I ever going to get any of this done? I've never even drilled holes in ANYTHING.

So basically I have total deer-in-the-headlights-itis. I had big plans to get the 1982 bathroom all repainted. When I needed a break from that, I was planning a trip to the baby furniture store to price out gliders. Maybe see if they have any mattresses or covers that will work with my bassinet. Instead I'm sitting here in my pajamas, eating M&Ms.

I know I'm overthinking this one. I have put together many a decent looking room totally by accident, and on a rational level I'm sure this nursery will be no different. But on an irrational level, however well I do or do not put together the nursery reflects how much I love the kid, or how good a mother I will be. I know that's asinine, but it's a feeling that's there somewhere. Maybe now that I've acknowledged it out in the open I can move on. Just buy some damn paint and get on with it.


Leopard Girl said...

You have three able and eager helpers-- all you need to do is tell the two of us when to be there!!

It's me ...Mavis said...

Put down the m&m's you slacker and get crackin! The room is not going to pain itself.